It's true, once you fall in love wih someone, you never fall out. That's what concerns me the most. I understand that you have loved me for so long (I hope), but you have loved her for longer. Will that ever truly fade? I just don't want to get hurt. I only have these feelings (doubts?) when I'm alone, though. When I'm with you, I would believe anything. I just feel, whole, with you. I don't know how to explain it, but it almost feels like I'm missing something when you're not here. It concerns me. What if she comes back and you take that part of me away forever? What will I do then? I do, however, want you to be happy. Whatever that means. But, in the process, I would very much like not to have my heart broken yet again. I just want this to work, for it to be right. It's a selfish selflessness. An oxymoron, a paradox, per usual when it comes to me. I almost wish things were simple. But then not, because that would make it mean less, it would take something away. I don't know what I'm saying anymore. It's just time for bed.